I have a teeny little sleeve

Hey, y'all! It's a new day and a new me! I was sleeved on Wednesday and aside from some bumps along the road, it's gone really well so far!

Here's what I remember. My surgery was scheduled for 2 p.m. and we were told to be there by 10 a.m. We arrived at 9:40 p.m. (traffic was light, for a change!) We didn't have to wait too long until we were brought back to the room. I got changed out of all of my clothes (except I was given permission to wear some of those oh-so-stylin' fancy granny panties because my TOM had of course decided to make an appearance. *eyeroll* They had given me a typical hospital gown, along with littleAnswered about a billion questions. Got my IV line in (and was very pleased that they used lidocaine to numb the area so it didn't hurt at all. The surgeon popped in at about 11 to say he was ahead of schedule and we would probably get into surgery earlier than scheduled. Yay! I had had NOTHING AT ALL by mouth after I had a drink of water at 11 p.m. Tuesday night, so this was great news.

So, we waited. I kept applying chapstick becase my lips were so dry. And we waited some more. Finally, at about 3 p.m., the nurse came in to start my IV antibiotics and said it would be about an hour until they were ready for me! Argh! My husband and I made the decision that he would leave immediately and go pick up our daughter at school, and hopefully get back not long after I went into surgery. I have to tell you, it sucked to have my support person leave, but we had no choice. My daugher had to be picked up, and no one else could do it on such short notice. So, I spent the last hour waiting by myself, driven to distraction by thirst.

Finally, they came to get me. I was wheeled into the operating room and asked to scoot over onto the actual operating table. And...the next thing I remember is waking up to a nurse's voice.

"Mrs. B., wake up; your surgery is over and it went well." I cracked open my eyes and looked around. And that's when the nausea started.

I'm not talking about "hmm, I wonder if I should take some Tums" kind of nausea. I'm talking about the "oh, God, I'm going to puke and I can't puke because I'll pull out my staples, but I can't stop it, so I'm going to puke!" kind of nausea. At that point, I could barely speak. The nurse kept asking if I was in pain, which I was, but the most pressing need at the moment was to NOT PUKE. I guess I finally was able to articulate that I needed something for nausea. They injected something into my IV line, and I felt a SLIGHT relief that lasted about 15 seconds, after which I started begging for something else.

Meanwhile, they had had to turn off my pacemaker/defibrillator during the surgery, and I could hear the heart monitor alarming almost constantly. I could hear them talking quietly to each other about needing to get someone down here to get my pacemaker/defib started up again. They gave me something else for the nausea, which worked about as well as the first one. By this time, I was dry-heaving almost constantly, and OMG it did hurt. "We're going to give you something for the nausea," someone said, and the next thing I remember, I was waking up in recovery AGAIN. There was much less nausea at this point, though it didn't completely stop until Friday night.

Finally, they started to take me to my room. Hubby was there waiting for me. I found out that it was after 9:30 p.m. -- I had been in Recovery for THREE HOURS. Hubby had to leave almost immediately to get home before the kids' bedtime. I was given sweet, blessed pain killers and more anti-nausea medication.

I slept about three hours and then insisted the floor nurses get me up and let me walk. Yow, the gas pains were awful! One would think there might be a way to expand the abdoment without needing to blow us up like a balloon and wait for the gas to dissipate by now! And I asked for something to drink. A lot. "Nothing by mouth for the first 18 hours" is my surgeon's policy. I asked to be able to brush my teeth. Nope. I asked if I could just gargle and spit. No. Ice chips? Nope. I just had to tough it out.

Thursday at mid-day, I finally got to drink some watered-down Crystal Light and apple juice...and it kinda hurt. I had my leak/swallow test. Aside from another bout with nausea, it was okay. Everything looked great!

Back to the room, and back to trying to drink something. The nurse brought me some sort of tomato cream soup, which irritated my throat and burned in my stomach. Vanilla milk went down a bit easier.

Friday was the day I was supposed to go home, but I still wasn't able to get down four ounces every hour, so they kept me another day. Frankly, I'm glad they did. I had the opportunity to walk more, practice sipping and  be sure I could tolerate enough liquids to keep from becoming dehydrated.

Okay, getting tired now, so to make a long story a little bit shorter, I got to come home today. Yay!

I hope y'all are all well! :)

Gastric Sleeve surgery?

So, I had pretty much decided on the gastric bypass. Read all about it, researched, talked to my doctor -- it was all good. But now, apparently, my insurance is also starting to pay for gastric sleeve surgery, and I'm right back in Indecisionville.

On the one hand, it would seem to be a good thing to not have to cut into my intestines. On the other hand, from the little I've read about the gastric sleeve, it apparently results in less weight loss than the bypass, and weight loss is the name of the game, right?

So now, I don't know! I'm not scheduled to see the regular medical doctor anymore -- after I lose three more pounds (*eyeroll*) I get scheduled to see the surgeon. What do I do?

Have any of you had the gastric sleeve? Or can you suggest bloggers who had that surgery so I can read first hand accounts?

More hoops jumped through!

I'm still here, jumping through every hoop they give me! I saw the regular bariatric doctor for the last time (I guess?) today, and then had the first of two nutrition classes.

/bitch and whine on

Okay, I understand that they have to give these basic nutrition courses in case someone has never heard it in their life, but seriously -- I'm willing to bet that most of the people in that room knew as much or more about nutrition, calories and protein than any of the three registered dietitions in the room. We overweight people have obsessed over, calculated and fudged enough calories in our time! We've lost (and regained and lost again!) weight. WE KNOW HOW. We are here because we need help getting there and STAYING THERE.

/bitch and whine off

ANYWAY. So, yes, the basic nutrition class is done. All I have left to do is the second nutrition class a week from Thursday (which I'm hoping will be more relevant to post-surgery diet than this class was). Oh, and lose 5 more pounds. The doctor I've been seeing (who said don't worry about losing the whole 16 lbs.) up and MOVED AWAY, so I have a new one, and this one is being a stickler for the five percent. It shouldn't be too hard.

After that, everything gets sent to my insurance and I get set up with an appointment to see the surgeon. The nurse said they usually hear back from insurance within a couple of weeks! Is it possible I may be getting my surgery in August?! SO EXCITED!

Oh, and I'm also excited because I finally got a recumbent exercise bike and I LOVE IT! I can go hard on it for 30 minutes and not even feel like I'm dying (which, you know, is always a plus.) I've been getting my lazy butt up 45 minutes early in the morning to fit in 30 minutes on the bike and another shower before work. Yep, I'm a little bit proud of that. \o/

Anyway, I'm off to catch up on my reading and see what y'all are up to! :D

Yay, followers!

I'm so excited to have eight followers! *squishes followers to mah bosom*

*ahem* I mean...Hi! ;)

Also, despite the tone of my last post, I can promise I really am not a Debbie Downer. Also, I found out a reason for the person yesterday telling me the RNY horror story, and now that I understand, I think it won't be quite so awkward to see this person on a regular basis.

So, I'm still in the hoop-jumping-through phase. My cardiologist signed off for me to have surgery, and even said I don't need to have a stress test, YES! I see the bariatric practice's nutritionist a second time in July, and have my third visit with the doctor. Oh, and I'm planning to go to the practice's support meeting next week. I'm SO, SO, SO pumped to get to talk to more people who have done this before!

Exercise today: walked as fast as I possibly could for 28 minutes on my lunch break, and omg my legs are KILLING me. I know at some point, my body will stop screaming through every millisecond I exercise. Just gotta hang on until that time. Oh, and I'm strongly considering getting a recumbent exercise bike this weekend.

Eating today: two protein drinks for breakfast and lunch, greek yogurt, grapes and an apple for snacks. Gluten-free pasta with meat sauce and veggies for supper. Watermelon for dessert. And the less said about those cheese puffs I had afterwards, the better, hmm?

Indecision -- to tell or not to tell?

I haven't made up my mind yet who to tell that I'm having bariatric surgery. So far, my husband and teenage daughter know, my sister and one friend at work. But I'm hesitant to tell others at this point.

If I am indeed having the roux en y surgery, I'm probably going to have to take two weeks off work. So, what do I tell my boss? Since I'm planning to use paid sick leave for part of that time, I tend to think I'll need to at least tell him...what? That I'm having a medical procedure? I mean, he's a good guy; I like him, and our workplace is much closer-knit than the typical workplace. I know he would keep it to himself if I told him.

But at the same time...this surgery feels much more personal to me, for some reason, than the one three years ago (defibrillator/pacemaker implanted.) Maybe I'm ashamed, even though intellectually I know it's something that will help me get healthy and stay healthy.

And then there's the subject of my other boss. It's complicated, but basically I'm being moved to another department for two days of the week because of budget cuts (stoopid economy.) Other Boss seems nice, but I don't know her very well. It's going to be harder to tell her.

And my dad is another question. He's older, not in the best of health and often frail emotionally. He worries. A LOT. My first instinct is not to tell him, but I see him frequently enough that he will probably realize I've had surgery (unless I heal superquick, I suppose.) And I'll be losing a lot of weight quickly, which may make him worry. So, do I tell him before and know he will worry, or tell him afterwards and know he will be mad that I didn't tell him...or not tell him at all?

Ugh, I don't know.

I'd love to hear how others have handled telling or not telling!

I CAN get there from here.

Well, it's been harder to get back in the habit of blogging than I anticipated, but I'm still on my way. The only questions are, where are we going, and how do we get there?

I had my second visit with the bariatric doctor yesterday. Sadly, I appear to be the only person on the planet who can eat much less food, exercise more than twice as much as I had been, and still gain weight. *facepalm* And since I'm supposed to be losing about 14 lbs. before surgery, I'm now on a two-protein-shakes-a-day, one-small-meal-a-day plan that my doctor suggested. So far, it's been fine, and I've not had much hunger. And I went for a walk on my lunch break today, and while it did seem that I was going to keel over a few times, I kept going, and went quite a bit farther than I have been. Hopefully I can keep this up and see a decrease in my weight next time.

Unfortunately, I'm going to have to evict the Cheetos. Poor Cheetos; it's not them -- it's me. I simply cannot resist their cheesy, salty, crunchy goodness. So they're going to have to go. *sniffle* Goodbye, my Cheetos!

I think I'm a bit closer to making a decision between RNY surgery and lap-band. My doctor said RNY patients tend to do a lot better, lose a lot more weight, and keep it off better. I'm concerned about having to take two weeks off work to recover -- at this point, I simply don't have that much leave accumulated. I used it all when I had pneumonia in January. And the fact that I'm running around to various appointments that are required for the bariatric program is making it harder to accumulate leave. But! If it's the right way to go, it's all going to work itself out just fine in the end. Meanwhile, I'm planning to go to the bariatric program's support meetings next month; my doctor said they should be helpful in making my decision.

One last note: I mentioned in my last post that I wanted to post separately about something, but it just would've turned into negativity, and I don't want to give into that. I really am an upbeat, positive person, so I surely don't want to turn into the Debbie Downer type. Suffice it to say that I met with the nutritionist at the bariatric program, and have another meeting with him next month.

Oh, and I almost forgot -- I go Monday for the psych evaluation. Hopefully, they don't think I'm crazycakes or anything. ;)

The Road So Far

I have to say, the whole process leading up to bariatric surgery has been frustrating so far. Let's recap:

1) Having been thinking about it since shortly after the New Year, I finally asked my doctor what she thought of Lap-Band surgery sometime in March. To my surprise, she thought it was an excellent idea and gave me the contact information for the bariatric practice. I called and signed up for the informational session.

2) Attended the informational session in April. Liked what I heard enough to sign up for the orientation session.

3) Attended the orientation session, paid $50 orientation fee. Received "Weight Loss Surgery for Dummies" (I'm not even kidding) and a notebook with some decent info on pre- and post- surgery diet. Took a nutritional evaluation.

4) Had first meeting with MD for the bariatric practice. The doctor (who is not the one who will do the surgery) seemed knowledgeable and for the most part, he was easy to like. I'm trying to ignore the fact that he looks like he graduated from kindergarten a few years ago. That's a slight exaggeration, but he did look pretty dang young. Paid the first 1/3 of the $400 "program fee" (non-refundable, and not covered by insurance.)

Apparently, the program fee includes the cost of the book and notebook from the orientation meeting, as well as an "InBody" evaluation. This machine reminded me of those old-timey scales that used to be found in drugstores, which would give you "Your Wate and Fate." Those used to give you your weight and fortune for a penny. This one produced a one-page evaluation that told me how much I weigh, my BMI and how much I need to lose...all of which I knew before I stepped on this glorified bathroom scales. There is some other information as well, such as my body water balance (apparently in the normal range), muscle development in all four limbs (also normal) and exactly how much of my body is muscle or fat. Interesting enough, but do I really need to know this? More to the point, was it worth paying for? I'm not convinced, so far. One number that did seem potentially useful was basal metabolic rate, which is the number of calories I burn per day at rest -- 1498 kcal. I have no idea if that is higher or lower than normal.

I told the doctor that I haven't yet decided whether to have gastric bypass or the lap-band. He gave me a little more information (for instance, he said 90 percent of their surgeries are gastric bypass) and told me to do some more thinking about it. Paid $50 for the doctor visit.

The fifth and most-recent happening, I'm going to give its own post.

Anyway, I don't have a clear idea of even when the surgery will take place. One person told me six months of meetings/appointments would be required, one said four, and still another (the one who handles the insurance companies) said three. I'm hoping for three, obviously. And I'm really no closer to deciding between gastric bypass and lap-band. Maybe someone who reads this will have some advice. :)

Repurposing this blog -- I'm On My Way

Well, for the four of you who may still be following this blog, thank you! As you may have noticed, this place has been gathering dust lately. I'm working on changing that!

So, over the next...however long it takes...I'm going to be deleting a bunch of posts that have little original content i.e. those with only embedded videos. It's likely that all of those are still on my youtube account, if for some reason you have grown attached to preview videos of three-year-old episodes of Supernatural. ;)

Of course, I hope y'all will decide to stick around for what comes next. My plan is to begin documenting a journey that I have just begun.

I am planning to have bariatric surgery. I'm in the initial stages of what turned out to be a longer, more complex and more frustrating process than I had imagined, and I find myself wanting to talk about it -- and write about it.

I do still want to write about fannish pursuits. Who knows; maybe this blog will become known as the home of the biggest fangirl who ever...became a smaller fangirl?

I'll work on that one.

Coming soon (I hope) will be an entry to explain what has happened (and not happened) so far in my journey.