Saturday, June 25, 2011
Indecision -- to tell or not to tell?
I haven't made up my mind yet who to tell that I'm having bariatric surgery. So far, my husband and teenage daughter know, my sister and one friend at work. But I'm hesitant to tell others at this point.
If I am indeed having the roux en y surgery, I'm probably going to have to take two weeks off work. So, what do I tell my boss? Since I'm planning to use paid sick leave for part of that time, I tend to think I'll need to at least tell him...what? That I'm having a medical procedure? I mean, he's a good guy; I like him, and our workplace is much closer-knit than the typical workplace. I know he would keep it to himself if I told him.
But at the same time...this surgery feels much more personal to me, for some reason, than the one three years ago (defibrillator/pacemaker implanted.) Maybe I'm ashamed, even though intellectually I know it's something that will help me get healthy and stay healthy.
And then there's the subject of my other boss. It's complicated, but basically I'm being moved to another department for two days of the week because of budget cuts (stoopid economy.) Other Boss seems nice, but I don't know her very well. It's going to be harder to tell her.
And my dad is another question. He's older, not in the best of health and often frail emotionally. He worries. A LOT. My first instinct is not to tell him, but I see him frequently enough that he will probably realize I've had surgery (unless I heal superquick, I suppose.) And I'll be losing a lot of weight quickly, which may make him worry. So, do I tell him before and know he will worry, or tell him afterwards and know he will be mad that I didn't tell him...or not tell him at all?
Ugh, I don't know.
I'd love to hear how others have handled telling or not telling!